Fear of Mr. Bubble

mr_bubble

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Like most children that have grown up in the last 100 years

I have an almost irrational fear of “Mr. Bubble.”

 

I remember seeing the commercials or seeing

his smiling picture on the bubble box.

There he was happy as could be

and just waiting to join me in the tub.

What the hell was wrong with this guy?

I thought this kind of thing was illegal for adults.

Yet it seemed to be strongly advocated by society

and my parents who bought the product.

 

As a result of this fear and trauma most kids

I knew tried to never bathe.

When their parents asked them to they would

often get physically sick with anxiety.

As a grown man I’m still not comfortable taking a bubble bath when I’m in court on trial for jaywalking.

 

And this horrible practice continues today.

Innocent children are needlessly terrified each year

over their fear of Mr. Bubble.

For the life of me I don’t know why we continue

to perpetuate this cycle of terror.

My boy will only take a bath with a gun.

For the love of God

I can’t understand why I keep buying this product for my kids.

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