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Like most children that have grown up in the last 100 years
I have an almost irrational fear of “Mr. Bubble.”
I remember seeing the commercials or seeing
his smiling picture on the bubble box.
There he was happy as could be
and just waiting to join me in the tub.
What the hell was wrong with this guy?
I thought this kind of thing was illegal for adults.
Yet it seemed to be strongly advocated by society
and my parents who bought the product.
As a result of this fear and trauma most kids
I knew tried to never bathe.
When their parents asked them to they would
often get physically sick with anxiety.
As a grown man I’m still not comfortable taking a bubble bath when I’m in court on trial for jaywalking.
And this horrible practice continues today.
Innocent children are needlessly terrified each year
over their fear of Mr. Bubble.
For the life of me I don’t know why we continue
to perpetuate this cycle of terror.
My boy will only take a bath with a gun.
For the love of God
I can’t understand why I keep buying this product for my kids.