Mary Magdalene



Hey, Chewbacca how did you get in here?

Chewbacca: May I use your bathroom?

Me: Same rule as Seven Eleven.

You have to buy something.

Chewy: How much for the that table top Mission lamp.

Me: $1 million.

Chewy: Here. I’ve had 5 cups of coffee on the drive over.

Me 15 minutes later: I’m charging you another $1million for lighting a candle.

Me: Hey Mary Magdalene.

Glad to see you could make it here after church.

Mary M: Here’s a veggie platter and some pork rinds.

Me: Here’s my garbage can.

Mary M: I’m not going back to prison.

Me: I think we’re all in the same boat here.

The S.S. Minnow.

Hey, Skipper. When did you and your little buddy get here?

Skipper: Could someone please stop Chewbacca from rummaging through the garbage for vegetables and pork rinds?

Knock. Knock.

Hey, it’s my next door neighbor Weeping Carlos:

W Carlos : What’s all the yelling going on over hear?

Me: I would characterize it as “somewhat louder” speaking at most.

W Carlos: You’re the only one here.

Me: Carlos.. are you real?


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