Who named grapefruit?

Perhaps someone who had never seen a grape

as a grapefruit in no way resembles a grape.

Perhaps they also didn’t already realize

that a grape was already fruit.

Thus, the name was both redundant and nonsensical.

Perhaps the fruit was named to honor the man who discovered it.

Fred Grapefruit.

Just like America was named after some guy named America.

Actually, Amerigo Vespucci.

Only he wasn’t American.

That sure as hell wouldn’t happen today in America!

Possibly in Vespucciland if the original name had stuck.

I’m glad the grapefruit wasn’t named by the guys

that decided that Pluto wasn’t a planet anymore,

otherwise it might be called something like

the low-sugar, mega-lemon.

Guys like this just don’t seem to be happy,

unless they are ruining things for the rest of us.

If it was up to me we would throw every last one

of them out of Vespucciland.


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