Guy Stuff

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Sometimes I like to get together with the guys and do “guy stuff.”

Especially, on Super Bowl Sunday.

We stopped by a “big box” store to get food and beer.

Ok, beer.

Ok, cheap beer.

Fortunately, the men’s room instead of having individual urinals had one of those

big stainless steel troughs, so we could all stand shoulder-to-shoulder and pee.

Bob: “Isn’t this great. We’re all standing together and peeing in a trough.

Me: “Wonderful.”

Once we got to Bob’s, Dave spent the entire first quarter of the game talking

in burp. You know, making complete sentence while burping.

Dan tried to light one of his farts on fire.

We  made sexually suggestive comments regarding the women in the beer

commercials. Also, potato chip and financial services commercials.

Ok, all the commercials.

After going to the bathroom, Jim decided he would be more comfortable watching

the game in just his boxer shorts. He needed to shave his back.

I looked over at Jim and his back and was glad a female gorilla hadn’t escaped from

the zoo that morning who might try to mate with him.

Me:”Jim what if there’s a fire?”

Jim: “There was a fire at the zoo this morning?”

I looked at Dan.

Dan smiled and farted.

Steve thought it would be funny like the movie “The Hangover” to slip a “roofie”

in my beer, but was so drunk he drank the beer himself.

We later saw him streaking across the field of the game we were watching.

Bob commented on how lucky we were that there were no women there

to limit our fun.

I raised an eyebrow and looked at Dan.

Dan smiled: “Pull my finger.”

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