The Internet Never Lies



Some say a fool and his money are soon parted.

Just nobody I know.

Probably some of your friends.

You know, the ones who are always broke?


Some say to know a man you need to walk a mile in his shoes.

Again, sounds like your friends.

What stranger is going to let you walk a mile

in his shoes under the premise:

“I just wanted to get to know you.”


Some say the world will end in fire

Some say in ice.

Actually, that was Robert Frost.

Great American poet.


If you weren’t always rotting your mind on the internet,

you might know that.

I think he’s probably right.

But to be sure, I’d have to look it up on the internet.


You also might  have an attention span greater than 3 seconds.

What were we talking about?


Oh, yeah…where do things come from.

I looked out the window at the rain and watched it pour out of the rain cloud.

Now where did that rain come from?

There was no telling while looking up at that rain cloud.

Perhaps a whale’s blow hole I thought

as I watched the rain pour out of that rain cloud.


I decided look it up on the internet.

Now that they have dealt with the “fake news” issue I can reliably get

this information from Facebook.


I typed in: Where does rain come from?

Well, how do you like that a picture of a rubber duck in a bathtub.

Oh wait…

That’s my screen saver.


Suddenly, I wanted to know where babies came from.

I decided to perform this search using “man’s search engine” on my boss’s computer,

because I heard there was a dead body in his office.


When I got there I was flabbergasted.

A word I had always wanted to be.


He had the same rubber duck in a bathtub screen saver as me!


There was no dead body, but when I typed in the search

it took me to a page that you had to be 18 or older to view.

When I clicked on the page there was a video of a couple trying to have a baby.

They were trying awfully hard.


Actually, I’m not sure all the things they were doing would  result in a baby.

But it was the internet, so it had to be true.

The internet never lies.


This seemed like pretty top secrete stuff for my boss to be watching

as it was also bookmarked under his favorites,

so I decided to screen lock his computer,

but inadvertently ended up directing the video

through the projector on ceiling to the screen on his wall.


“Hmmmm.” I thought as I responsibly left his office.


A couple minutes later I heard the administrative assistant screaming.

Pretending to care I returned to his office to calm her.


Me: “That’s nothing. You should see his screen saver. It has a duck!”


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