The Day I Became God


One day instead of just “scooping” the cat box

for the 15th time or so, I decided to actually change

the cat litter.

It was an “epiphany.”

Whatever the hell that means.

I guess it means my neighbors celebrate.

Look at them dance.

And the apartment manager stops by to tell me

a sheriff’s representative will not be serving me

with an “eviction” notice today.

And that when I invite a friend over to watch the game

he/she actually comes in instead of standing outside

shaking his/her head and crying.

What’s that all about?

Perhaps on the way over they saw a squirrel run over by a car.

I know the feeling.

Hmmmm, all very interesting.

Especially, since I don’t even have a cat.

Oh, sorry…that was a “typo.”

How presumptuous and embarrassingly

lacking in proper sense of humility.

I would have thought that would have been caught

by a decent spell-checker.

It should have read:

“The Day I Became God Good…

At Changing the Cat Box and Thus Became Far Superior to God”




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