Terrorist Penguins



I don’t know why the government ever funded a nuclear submarine for penguins,

but it appears they now have us over a barrel.


A barrel of tasty herrings if I know anything about penguins.


And why we gave them all those nuclear missiles I’ll never know.

And the launch codes I’ll never understand.


Now there holed up under the North Pole threatening to blow Santa Claus to Kingdom Come.


They all passed their background checks.

Well, except that one from Argentina.

But he had diplomatic immunity.

Other than that they were home grown

American born and raised terrorist penguins.


No one saw this thing coming.

No one ever does.

The situation was quickly deteriorating

someone had to act quickly to restore sanity.


Finally the call went out to the President on the hotline.


“I’m sorry we do not negotiate with terrorists.”


There was a 10 second pause.


“But we do negotiate with penguins.”


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